Alright, my fellow Leprechauns... time for another edition of my weekly Anti-Preview. Once again I will sit here and tell you everything that you should be doing, and expecting this Saturday.
Just a reminder, Subway Domer Publishing can not be held responsible for its own actions- let alone yours.
Michigan. Stupid, stupid, skunkbears. Riding high off of a 3-9 season, a billion transfers, a "scandal" in the making, and a huge- HUGE win against Western Michigan, has Skunkbear Nation believing in themselves again and worshipping a couple of freshman quarterbacks.
Make no mistake about it... the skunkbears have a few weapons at their disposal, but Sam McGuffie is now in Houston selling crack and hanging out with Bushwick Bill. You remember McGuffie from last year. He was the only Michigan player that truly showed up.
Have faith in the Tenuta schemed defense. There are many, many ways to stop the spread, and even more when the biggest threat is the quarterback himself. Tenuta is a master game-planner and has seen this offense on more than a few occasions- Maybe Michigan does need to use 3 quarterbacks?...
What should you be drinking? The Bloody Ann Arbor (or you may also know it as The Bloody Mary). This fine cocktail is used by The Subway Domer to battle hangovers and to make breakfast a little more delightful with family and mooching friends. There are many, many ways to make this drink of whores, but here is my best advice to you... go buy some Daily's Bloody Mary Mix and:
- Fill bar glass with ice.
- Fill glass a little less than 3/4 full with mixer.
- Fill rest of glass (1 to 1.5 shots) with Grey Goose Vodka.
- Drop in a celery stick
- Put some big ass green olives on a stick and drop in.
Of course, some of you may want to say you "handmade" your own Bloody Ann Arbors. Follow this recipe, and you will be "close."
What should you be eating? The olives from the Bloody Ann Arbor. Need more? Alright. I guess we may need a bit more protein as we go skunkbear hunting piss ass drunk from all of the Grey Goose vodka we just inhaled. (BTW- you may want a pack of Rolaids if the Bloody Ann Arbors were a little spicy). I suggest a nice pan-fried steak such as this one:
What should you be wearing? This is just an assumption, but I'm sure you just bagged a skunkbear in the wee morning hours and after walking home in semi-straight lines from the Bloody Ann Arbors, and content after filling your belly with the steak- you may decide to go up north to that whore's lair. That place is a toxic dump and should be treated as such. You will need some of these:
I also suggest one of these bad boys that can be purchased at the Subway Domer store located on the right column of this website. Warning: Replacing the words "Fuck" with "Muck and "Michigan" with "Fichigan" will not make entry into Notre Dame Stadium an easy one. Cappy wants you to take it off... take it all off.
Offensive MVP: Kyle Rudolph- and it shouldn't even be close. I have heard two different rumors about what defensive strategy Michigan may use on Saturday. Both of which, leave Kyle Rudolph in position to run motherfucking wild all day. One of those defenses would be a press cover 2, which would open up the middle of the field and put Michigan linebacker / Irish bitch Stevie Brown matching up against Rudolph.
Rudolph is completely legit. His combination of size and speed is uncommon, but he also runs really good pass routes. If it weren't for Michael Floyd galloping all over Notre Dame Stadium last Saturday, Rudolph would have put up bigger numbers than his 4 receptions for 29 yards and a touchdown.
I expect BIG things from Rudolph as he tries to cement his status as one of the nations premier tight ends. Watch him closely, because I don't think Michigan will be able to handle him as Floyd and Tate take coverage downfield.
Defensive MVP: Brian Smith. He has to take his game to the next level. Not only should he be making the big play here and there, to be truly great he must make good plays on a consistent basis. After what looked to be a prelude to a big game against Nevada in the first half, Brian was pretty quiet the rest of the game.
At any rate, Brian was playing a key role against a spread team in his newly gained WILL position. Smith is most effective when he is more of a wildcard, and blitzing from the outside in, as opposed to the inside out. How effective he and Toryan Smith (Mike) are against the run will determine if Brian stays outside, or if he moves back in with Te'o taking over the WILL role.
Smith is primed for a big game, and even if he doesn't register 10 tackles with 2 sacks- I would put a lot of money on the table that he creates one HUGE turnover early.
The Sleeper: Robert Hughes. With Aldridge out, Robert Hughes takes over that big back / fullback role that Aldridge was playing. Not only does Notre Dame need to hang on to the football, but they also will need to hang on to drives. 3rd and 1, 3rd and an inch- you get the point. Irish fans may finally get what they have been asking for, for the past 3 years. An Allen and Hughes backfield.
Something else to watch: Sam Young and his matchup against Brandon Graham. The Fighting Irish must keep Jimmy Clausen upright to attack this defense that is talented- but young and slightly injured.
Young takes a backseat in leadership to Eric Olsen along the front five, but he can lead by example with inspired play. Last week, Sam looked like a new player as he played with fire and emotion- against Nevada. He will have to have that same type of mentality for 60 minutes, for what some may consider a bigger rival in Michigan. Watch Sam as closely as you would watch a skunkbear on the hunt. I expect big things from him and I am positive that he will deliver.
So who's gonna win? IRISH 34-20. The offense will continue to roll for the 3rd game in a row despite playing a better defense. I don't expect them to jump out to a big lead as in last years contest, but I do expect them to pull away in the second half. This is the 3rd different score prediction from me- so take it as a sign. That sign says: GO IRISH!!! Fuck Michigan!!!